By Judith Eve Rosen, LCSW, Veterinary Social Worker
Saying goodbye to a beloved animal companion can be one of the most painful moments in life. No matter the circumstances or the age of your best friend, it’s hard to imagine your home and your life without their presence.
Here are some tips that may help:
Grief Is as Unique as You Are
The most important thing to remember is that the experience of grief is unique to every individual. There is no “right” or “wrong” way to feel, and there is no “normal” timeline.
You may feel strong emotions, a mix of conflicting emotions, or no emotion at all. Deeply grieving the loss of a pet does not make you “crazy”—it simply means you deeply loved them.
Talk to Someone
Identify which family members and friends are likely to be the most understanding and reach out to them. Let them know that the best way they can help is by listening without judgment.
There are also several online support groups and pet loss hotlines available. You may also wish to speak with a therapist who specializes in pet bereavement.
See the resources section below.
When You’re Ready, Memorial Rituals Can Help
Many people find comfort in familiar rituals from their own culture, while others create rituals that are unique to them.
Remember: if it’s upsetting to see your pet’s belongings, it’s okay to put them away for now. If you decide to donate or give away items, consider saving a few meaningful keepsakes in a box in case you want them later.
Some memorial ideas include:
- Creating a memorial space in your home with a photo or portrait, an urn containing their ashes, flowers, a candle, a favorite toy, or a collar.
- Holding a memorial service where friends and family share memories, read poetry, scatter ashes, or read journal entries written in their honor.
- Keeping something that belonged to your pet nearby at night, such as a blanket, clothing item, or favorite pillow.
- Making a donation to an animal shelter or animal welfare organization in your pet’s memory.
It’s Okay to Take a Pause
If you work, consider speaking with your HR department about taking time off. While still uncommon, some employers offer bereavement leave for the loss of a pet.
If bereavement leave is not available, ask whether personal leave or other time-off options may be available.
Students may wish to speak with professors or instructors about making up assignments if they need a few days to process their loss.
Take Care of Yourself
Try your best to maintain a routine, get adequate sleep, and eat nourishing meals.
If you’re able, gentle exercise and physical activity can also support emotional healing.
Resources
Animal Medical Center Pet Loss Support Group
https://www.amcny.org/pet-loss-support-program/
Cornell University Pet Loss Support Hotline
607-218-7457
Tufts University Pet Loss Support Hotline
508-839-7966
Crisis Hotline (24/7)
988
Book Recommendation
Life After Pet Loss: Daily Reflections for Working Through Grief by Judith Eve Rosen (available through Amazon)
Judith Eve Rosen, LCSW, VSW
Website: juditheverosen.com
Interested in Therapy?
Call 917-524-9839 for a free 15-minute consultation.